Welcome to the machine.

I teach graduate level TV writing sometimes. Why? ‘Cause they ask me to. Who is they? Don’t worry about it. (Not to be coy. I just like to keep my fingers in all the jam jars.) (Gross. Pretend I didn’t say that out loud.) (I didn’t.)

Anyhoo. I was teaching this dude at this institution over zoom last Friday night–it was our last class ever, supposed to end at 8pm PST /11pm PST but we were in OT by like 20 minutes because I have time blindness and he is polite– and I started panicking that I hadn’t transferred every last particle of wisdom from my brain to his. So as a kind of pedagogical hail mary, I hurled five words at him that had been floating in my head regarding how characters manipulate one another to get what they want.

I forgot what they were. But the next day I hurled a bunch more at him over text, along with some new categories in table format. And he was like, “stop teaching me.”

No, he didn’t say that. He told me it was a good idea and I believed him because he’s very smart. And so I tweaked it a bit more and posted it to insta and people liked it, and then today I made a reel and a PDF and now I have to stop because I have an actual job.

Side note: Writing active characters is very very hard. Especially for us playwrights, whose currency is language and electrons. Sometimes we forget to write what changes and instead we write what happens. It’s not necessarily a bad thing. But it’s harder to sustain on a small screen than it is in a shared live space with everyone facing the same direction and nobody folding their laundry.

So! I made a chart. Here’s the PDF if you want an official version with exercises and stuff. And here is just the chart:

A chart. I made it.

I think it works? Let me know if I’m wrong. Or just think it quietly to yourself and I’ll believe you like it because I’m sensitive and you’re a good person. ♥️

Are you free?

To talk? For like a second?

The strike is over, HEEEYYY, it’s over and it was very hard and progress was made and I think it’s finally sinking in that it is really and truly over. But while it wasn’t, I made some fitness content to help people stay healthy on the picket line and to keep myself sane and occupied. The vids can be used in a non-picketing capacity too, if you want. And no, I’m not monetized. I like giving out free shit. Also I have a ton of niche knowledge from my side gig and nowhere to dump it.

In other news… I spent the afternoon updating the Tripwire website (different side gig). In the middle of trying to untangle some tricky code I got clobbered by a cannonball of gratitude. Like, how lucky I am to be in the same field as the people who made those books with me? Not to be a dork, but theater is fucking cool. It’s intense and nerdy and awkward and psychotic and a little evil and I love it.

And if you make theater, you’re evil too and I love you and thank you for not stopping, ever.

Bye.

Corporate greed made me do it.

And by “it” I mean, dive naked head-first into an Olympic-sized pool of razor blades. Which is how it feels to be dealing with the logistical, financial, and emotional fallout of the colossal WGA work shut-down. In case you’re curious.

Week three.

In addition to having one’s career be snuffed out overnight for the foreseeable future AGAIN (ok, 2020 theater), nothing could have prepared me for the physical labor of pacing non-stop for four hours daily while battling near constant coastal winds with a giant poster board. Not to mention the writerly shame of failing to invent a witty sign slogan.

Unshockingly, we’re not the only labor organization willing to risk everything for better working conditions and fair pay. People are tired of feeling broken and used. And yes, the process of resisting harmful structures is grueling and time consuming and terrifying. But in my experience, unified action CAN AND WILL create change.

And of course, we could use help. Allyship works. I did math to prove it:

• one voice = sound

• two voices = harmony

• three voices = noise

• 100 voices = thunder

I realize I sound like a Facebook post about climate change or a Gofundme page for a no-kill shelter. But I’m too goddamn tired to make it sexy. I have ideas. You could donate bulk snacks to the picket lines. Or give $$ to the WGA relief fund. Or walk with your striking friends at a designated picket site. Or post solidarity messages on social media. Or (big one) re-consider your relationship to the subscription services you patronize. Even the tiniest gesture could be the morale boost that gets us all through the long summer ahead. ‘Cause bro, we’re gonna need it.

With gratitude and determination,

PS: If you literally have no idea what I’m talking about, start here.